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With only six days left until the end of the Chocolate Hearts Book Giveaway, I thought I would share my best Valentine experience.

The best Valentine experience had nothing to do with romantic love at all. It was more of a tradition and an expression of family bonds than a showing of romantic love.

Being a workhorse by nature, I have never been highly successful in the arena of romantic love. I am only able to read and write about it due to it being such an emphasis all around us at all times. Besides whether we experience the kind of love we want or not, we can invision what we hope to find, can’t we?

For me personally, during adolescence, when girls really begin to associate Valentines Day with romantic love instead of just friendship, my father kept the focus on love in general. From the time I was six years old until shortly before his death, when I was 24, he provided me with a Valentine every Valentine’s Day.

I use to feel sad at watching all the girls around me at school and later the women around me at work showcasing that year’s Valentine’s gift because I very rarely got to experience it. I didn’t date much and still don’t.

My father broadened my view of Valentine’s Day with a card, a stuffed animal or a box of chocolate every Valentine’s Day, and while it wasn’t from some guy who was professing his undying love, it was from a man who intensly loved his child.

It wasn’t the same of course, one being paternal love and the other being romantic, but it always made me feel better because it still represented a caring and a feeling of being special.

As a matter of fact, I didn’t realize how much it meant to me until the first Valentine’s Day after my father died. Realizing an empty Valentine’s Day was upon me that year, I shared what was going to be a difficult day with my mother. When the mailbox was empty and I realized there would be no more Valentine’s, I felt a sadness deeper than any sadness I could feel due to not having a significant other.

That first Valentine’s Day after his death, my mother attempted to ease the emptiness by sending me a Valentine. While it wasn’t the same, the effort did warm my heart and better prepared me for what could no longer be.

Valentine’s Day is no longer difficult, sad or painful for me because  I now have a stack of Valentines my father sent which allow me to reminisce anytime I want. Among all the jewelry, chocolates and flowers, don’t forget what lessons Valentine’s Day truly brings us.

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