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One of the exciting things about being a writer is the fact that you never know where your next story will come from. We’ve discussed repeated about how much I love magazines. Well I was reading Success magazine tonight and came across a story about TheKnot.com.

Being single, I generally skip over wedding related articles, but since I recently wrote 19 pages of wedding content for a bridal shop in Colorado, I am a little less adverse to reading on the topic. (At the moment anyway!)

This article wasn’t about getting married. The company The Knot and it’s website was being featured in the January’s Success monthly column called “From the Corner Office”.

I’ve been to TheKnot.com before, when a former co-worker was showing me a dress she was considering for her wedding. What I didn’t know about this website before reading this article was the fact that it was started as a result of a multicultural need. The owners, Carley Roney and David Liu were having trouble finding information geared toward their needs. They are an interracial couple and the bridal resources on the market were not geared toward this demographic.

What was even more interesting was the fact that the bridal resources available played to the stereotype that only women were interesting in wedding resources. Liu, being an active groom, was a shining example of another member of a demographic not being served in the wedding industry.

The Knot.com is now more than an online wedding resource. According to Success, it garners 100 million page views a month and earned nearly $104 million dollars in 2008.

Liu and Roney have continued to serve the under-served cultural niche. This niche includes resources for same-sex couples, newlyweds, expecting parents, blended families, and other wedding situations that include real people living real lives. Pregnant brides, divorced parents and second marriages are all topics that require attention that many traditional wedding resources pretend don’t exist.

TheKnot.com has found a way to be success by fulfilling a need and providing resources to our ever-changing relationship culture.

I’m always filled with a little sadness and nostalgia when something or someone from the culture of my childhood slips away. I felt that way about Michael Jackson and I felt that way when I found out  that Asbury Park, New Jersey closed down their amusement park.

The most recent event that brought on these feelings is the death of Theodore “Teddy” Pendergrass. I was a little girl and I can remember my father and my grandfather playing some of his best songs. Songs such as “Turn Off the Lights“, “Love TKO“, and “Close the Door“.

However, a few years ago, I discovered what would become my most favorite Teddy Pendergrass song of all time, when Nelly remade “Come, Go With Me”. Nelly’s version was called “My Place“. When I found out it was a remake of Teddy’s song, I had to hear the original.  I ended up liking Teddy’s original best and the song reconnected me to the singer’s talent. Something I hadn’t thought about since I was a child.

In tribute to the passing of a great sensual balladeer, here’s “Come, Go With Me.”

Thank you Teddy Pendergrass for your tremendous contribute to R&B Soul! May you rest in peace!

The idea of a culture that over-indulges is not a new concept, but it recently dawned on me the numerous ways excess exhibits itself. We are use to the idea of excess in terms of addiction. For example, addictive behaviors are associated with excessive behavior in one area or another such as excessive eating, drinking or drugs. However, think about the
other areas where we do something to excess. What brought this topic about for me has to do with my music habits.

One of my freelance gigs requires that I write in an office setting. So, in order to block out the office chatter, I listen to music through ear buds while I work. Here’s where my excess comes into play. I listen to Internet radio (Shout out to all my Slacker Radio Fans) which allows me to create my own channels with my favorite artists. (I promise this
isn’t a plug). While all the artists I am listening to are my favorites, I like some songs better than others. So of course, when a favorite song comes on, I jeopardize my hearing by bumping the volume louder in my ear buds. When a less enjoyable song comes on, I dial down the volume to a more sensible level. The same thing happens in my car. I listen to mix CDs and crank up my most favorite songs.

This exemplifies just how far excess reaches. Why does it seem like I enjoy my favorite songs more when they are cranked up to eardrum vibrating decibels? It’s not the same as those drivers who roll down the window and pump up the sound system to share their favorite tunes with everyone who’s in earshot on the street. It’s my own little world, where only my favorite songs are my soundtrack and my only focus is my writing. It also funny how I find office chatter distracting but the vocals to these songs never seem to disrupt my concentration or my creative process.

Unlike food or drink that allows us to get those feel-good endorphins every time we eat or drink it, no matter how much I crank up that song it’s still going to last the same amount of time based on the recording time. Nevertheless, I crank it up, tap my feet and bounce my head as I work.

Next time you think about your excesses, think about all the ways you over-indulge that have nothing to do with the traditional targets of over-consumption. You just may discover something about your own
individual or personal work culture you’ve never thought about.

I’ve mentioned before that I am a little magazine obsessed. I love books too, but there is just something about a good magazine that I just love. When I want to get a quick info fix filled with interesting insights, pictures, and stats, a magazine really satisfies. ( Yes, like a Snickers bar).

The subject of this post was spurred by a small magazine filler from this month’s issue of Women’s Health magazine. The filler is entitled, “Pretty Words” reminds us that words are not just words.

According to the article which sites a study in the journal Psychological Science where study participants were hooked up to a machine to measure the activity of the facial muscles we use when we smile or frown. The participants facial reactions were recorded when they were asked to read a series of emotion verbs such as frown, cry, laugh etc. The result was that happy verbs caused a response in the subjects’ smile muscles while the sad ones activated the frown muscles’ response.

As writers and those who love to read already know, language does physically resonate with us and it makes an impression on how we feel, according to the study’s coauthor G. Sermin, Ph.D., of Utrecht University in the Netherlands.

As I think of the ways that we use words to elicit a response or to provoke action in others, for example, greeting cards, research studies, wedding invitations, letters of complaint, and too many other forms of word communication that too many to mention, it definitely weakens the idea that words are harmless. Words can console and they can also start arguments and even wars. It’s our words and our thoughts that lead to our positive or negative actions.

Words trigger memories and they lend to a variety of interpretations and connotations. How words are used and interpreted go far beyond the words meaning. Our own culture and environment also play a role. Put in this context, words do indeed become very powerful.

The next time you speak or write, know the power of your words.

After the Storm, a Gay, Interracial Erotic short story, is about a rich hotelier’s son, Ethan Conrad, who is make the most of his new life in Indiana after being forced to run the hotel there after his involvement in a same-sex affair his father viewed as a family sex scandal.

Ethan falls head over heels in lust over Marcus, the manly carpenter he hired to construct his art room. Thanks to the wisdom of his Italian housekeeper, Ethan discovers that his desires may not be one-sided, however, there is deep pain holding Marcus back.

While I didn’t care for Ethan’s controlling and relentless pursuit of Marcus, in the short space of 42 pages, Steele shows us how sometimes we need an outside push in order to resume living our lives after a tragedy. Steele also shows how vulnerability can often turn superficial lust into something much more meaningful. Once Marcus acknowledges his desires, the love scenes between Marcus and Ethan are as tender as they are steamy.

I give Jaxx Steele’s After the Storm four out of five Sable Seals.

Publisher: Red Rose Publishing

Genre: Interracial Gay Erotica

Page Length: 42 pages

As I mentioned in a previous post, I am currently a freelance writer for a web development company. The company is growing and they hired a new guy to handle imaging for the websites they build.

In working there, I am learning a lot about family culture. One particular lesson occured under my nose and I almost missed it. A few of the fellows that work there decided to go across the street to grab lunch at a deli.  The deli is operated by a Korean family.  My co-workers often refer to the deli as “the Korean Cafe” and “The Koreans”. I never paid much attention to it until the “new guy” came back to the office after taking a trip to the deli. He made a interesting observation. “The place was nice and the food looked good, but its strange that they don’t sell Korean food there.”

While we might think twice about eating Asian food that’s not cooked byAsians unless there’s some special interest of the chef, why would we assume a restaurant owned by a member of a particular ethnic group would only serve food from their culture.

It actually reminds me of that Seinfeld episode where Jerry convinces Apoo to change his restaurant menu to Pakistani. Why would we assume that people would be so one-dimensional?

When I was working in education, there was also a deli in the buiding that was run by an Asian couple. It never occured to me or anyone else during the three years I worked there that the deli should have been serving Asian food.

Business offer their goods and services based on what the location will bear. It probably made more sense to the couple who owns the deli to offer a more basic deli menu to appeal to a corporate complex.

Early last year I wrote an article about the culture of hair. I wrote about what the effect short hair, long hair and baldness have on our perceptions of others. A few months ago the media campaign started for Chris Rock’s comedy documentary, Good Hair. It finally hit a theatre near me this weekend.

I’ve been looking forward to seeing this movie ever since I first heard about it. Chris Rock is a big reason why I wanted to see this movie but I also wanted to get his take on the subject matter. It is interesting to get a black man’s perspective on the lengths black women go to have a presentable and attractive head of hair. Hair is a major issue for all of us. Men and women both worry about how to keep their hair and how to keep it youthful.

In the movie, Rock explains that it was his young daughter’s lament over not having “good hair” that triggered his exploration into the concept. I can remember from a very early age being exposed to the concept of “good hair” and “bad hair”. Good hair is long, healthy, straight and easy to manage. In other words, good hair was Caucasian hair or Indian hair. Growing up in New Jersey until the age of nine, I definitely remember admiring the long flowing hair of my Caucasian, Puerto Rican and Indian classmates. Thanks to my mother’s natural talent and the use of a good relaxer, I had long, thick hair.

Like most documentaries, Rock takes his research on the road to North Carolina, Georgia, New York, California and India, to explore the black hair care industry.

From the Bronner Brothers Hair Convention in Atlanta to the Dudley Hair Manufacturing estate in North Carolina, Rock shows us the big business of hair. From weaves to the sodium hydroxide that makes up hair relaxers, Rock not only investigates what we do to our hair as black women but how that practice impacts the men in our lives and our pocketbooks. It was very entertaining to watch Rock go to the people in black beauty salons and barber shops to get the perspective on black women’s hair from everyday black people.

One of the most telling moments in the documentary was when Rock sat down with five young black women who were about to graduate from high school. All but one girl had relaxed hair or a weave. The remaining girl wore her hair in a natural afro. Rock asked them if they felt the need to keep up the weaves and relaxers to obtain favorable employment. All the girls except the one with the natural hair felt that someone with natural hair wouldn’t be taken seriously and would have a harder time finding work. They all agreed that the natural hair of the remaining girl was attractive but they didn’t think it was professional or would be accepted in the work environment. The idea that the natural state of our hair is unprofessional and not acceptable is a direct result of what black girls have been indoctrinated with since the time they were very little girls.

There were so many themes covered in this movie. Rock touches on how the majority of black hair care lines are owned and operated by white conglomerates and Asian entrepreneurs. The black hair care industry generates billions. We may be less than 25% of the U.S. population, but we account for 80% or more of the hair care products and services being bought and sold. In fact, one of the largest exports for India is real human hair weave. Rock travels to India to show us where the Indian hair extensions American women pay upward of $1000 for come from. In India, the people often sacrifice their hair in a religious ceremony. Hair is very valuable and that’s why they sacrifice it to God. It is that hair that is cut, cleaned, and sown on strands to be converted to tracks of hair to be sold and exported to the U.S.

I was only able to touch on a few of the themes Rock covered in his documentary Good Hair.  With interviews Rock had with the head of Dudley, Bronner Brothers, and actresses and actors like Ice T, Rev. Al Sharpton, Nia Long, Raven Symoné, Maya Angelou, and the lead singers from the ’80s girl rap group Salt and Pepa among others, it was amazing to see a cultural perspective that permeates throughout an entire ethnic race and it isn’t regional in terms of one side of North America to the other.  Whether you are a black woman in California or a black woman in New York City, the perspective on hair is the same.

Some reviewers mentioned that Rock offered no solutions. Personally, I think that as long as flowing long straight hair is considered the benchmark for attractiveness, many black women will continue to pay to achieve it. The perception isn’t restricted to women of the black community. These days, extensions are also seen among our white sisters. I think another factor deals with women’s (regardless of race) obsession to look like the stars they admire in Hollywood. Instead of being the best they can be, they often strive to be someone else. I think we forget that actors and actresses are performers regardless of whether they are on or off the set. So they are expected to look a certain way no matter what. Everyday women want Julia Roberts’ smile or Jennifer Aniston’s haircut. Once we embrace the characteristics that make us different and beautiful, many women will no longer see the need to spend, on an annual basis, the money equivalent to the price of a compact car on hair extensions and other services.

There were also jokes during the movie about being addicted to creamy crack, or hair relaxer. As a woman who has been relaxing my hair longer than I can remember, I would love to be able to kick the relaxer habit. But having used relaxer every two months for nearly 30 years, I’ve definitely seen my hair become less thick. It use to be a lion’s mane when I was growing up. It would be interesting to see what the result would be.

Chris Rock’s documentary Good Hair, may seem frivolous to some considering the challenging economic times we are in. But our perceptions of ourselves both on the inside and on the outside carry a lot of weight in other areas of our lives. So this exploration is a valid one in the hope that we can adopt more healthy perceptions about ourselves and what’s really important.

When it comes to culture we rarely think of individual families having one of their own. We all have witnessed aspects of our family that we would swear exists in no other family. If those traits are dysfunctional we may be relieved to discover that we are not alone. If those traits are especially supportive then we may assume that the majority of society’s families function in the same manner.

It wasn’t until I began freelancing for a local family-owned software/web development company that I recognized the family unit as a cultural unit. It makes sense when you think of how the family originates. It starts with the coupling of two people who may or may not have similar upbringings. Regardless, there will be differences as everyone’s response to the same environment is different. This couple comes together to construct their own family with a set of culture values that while influenced from their own individual families, will differ due to the adoption and rejection of some family processes and values each person was exposed to during childhood.

It is that newly developed family cultural environment that a couple creates that dictate the couple’s quality of life and the quality of life for their children. As a result, we are a product of the cultural environment we grow up in–not just in our community but in our household as well. This is no ground-breaking theory, but families are rarely described as cultural units.

If you desire to write deeper characters, don’t just think of them in the social environment you’ve placed them in, think about the cultural environment of the family that enhanced or stifled their personalities. A child who grows up poor but has a family unit where they constantly focuse on the betterment of all those involved, that child will most likely have a different adult life than a poor child who grows up in a family unit where the focuse is on what they don’t have and functions in life as if the world owes them something.

Think about how a particular family culture causes you characters to react to the circumstances you place them in.

It’s that time of year again. September 15th is the start of Hachette Book Group’s Hispanic Heritage Month. Sable Lit Reviews is proud to participate for the second year in a row.

Hachette is offering 5 great reads. Find out more about the contest by selecting the WIN BOOKS tab listed at the top of this block.

Show your support for the value of multicultural fiction. Good Luck!

Many freelance guru’s point out that not all the freelance work exists in New York, Chicago and Los Angeles. There’s plenty of work to be had in your own locale due to local magazines, newspapers and small businesses. Thanks to Craigslist, I landed a freelance contract with a local website and software applications company.

I have been working for this small business since the last week in April and I have learned a great deal about small business, marketing and the family-owned small business in particular. I’ve come into contact with a lot of clients who want and need different things. They all want to increase revenue but many are still in the dark about their web presence and how software applications can make them more efficient.

Your perception of your writing skills or lack of them really emerges as you begin to writing content about everything including locksmith services, fire extinguisher sales and service, Christian childcare, insurance adjuster training, patio covers and landscaping.

 When it’s all said and done, you wonder how you made any of these services sound interesting to someone not in the field.

If you find yourself with an opportunity to write locally for the businesses that cater to your neighborhoods, you may surprise yourself with the contributions you can make to those businesses and your metropolitan area. Good Luck.